The venting girl

I made a personal decision to lose weight. I felt like it was the change I needed to make to become mentally and physically better; for my peace of mind. I lost over 17kgs in 10months. Yey me! My family members liked me a lot more, some friends too. People noticed I was human. It blew my mind. Felt good and bad at the same time.

However, with time I gained back the weight. Not all of it, but just a little, and then the comments came back. I was no longer human. Everyone has an opinion about me being fat.

I have a ten-year window I have given myself to lose weight, try different diets and exercises to see which works for me and what fits best for me in the long run. But I don’t owe anyone an explanation. I prefer silence.

Despite deciding individually, “the community” around me seems to think they have control over me, hence commenting about what I look like.

These are some of the stupid mean things people have said to me:

1. “You know men don’t like fat women.” (My mind: it’s a preference🤷🏾‍♀️)

2. Eh! You have gotten big again. You need to be serious and get small. (I don’t know who asked you.)

3. You are big, you have fat to keep you warm, give me your sweater. (Please don’t be stupid.)

4. I will only date you if you lose weight. (I don’t know who asked or told this boy-child I was interested in him🤦🏾‍♀️.)

5. I don’t understand how people can like big/ fat women. (I don’t understand how small-minded a person can be.)

The list is endless. People thrive on tearing others down. The things you say affect people even if it’s just a joke. You do not know what a person is dealing with behind closed doors. Be nice!

My silence doesn’t mean I am weak. It’s quite the contrary. I know not to waste time and emotions on certain people. Because it’s straining. Some opinions shatter my emotions... But I will not be broken permanently. I just know to love myself a bit more each time because people will always have something to say.

Before you speak think, if you can’t think, just keep quiet.

Be emotionally intelligent if not stay home.

Fat doesn’t equal disease (like most doctors seem to communicate. But because I am fat, I am automatically sick.)

Fat does not equal ugliness!

Fat does not equal a violent person!

Fat does not equal laziness!

Fat does not equal unfit!